some day

Emily at Chatting at the Sky has a beautiful post today about remembering what it is like to be a mom to little ones... which got me thinking about this:

I'll never forget last summer... I was pregnant and nauseous all the time and had just finished doing the 'big grocery shopping' with my then 3 & 1.5 year old in tow. I realized that I hadn't thought to find a parking space next to one of the cart return stalls and I had just loaded up the girls, started the car to get the a/c going (blasted Oklahoma 100*+ summers) and loaded all of my groceries into my trunk. I stood there with my cart, probably looking pretty perplexed, and weighed my options

• leave the cart in the middle of the lot where it will probably get caught in the wind and put a major ding into some undeserving person's vehicle
• make a run for it, leaving the girls in the car, and hope no one notices that there is an unattended car running
• unload the super cranky children and make them go with me to the cart stall

... and then like an angel, another mom pulled up next to me saw the trouble on my face and offered to take my shopping cart for me. I will NEVER forget that small act of kindness. She mentioned that she knew what it was like. I hope that some day I can offer the same kindness to another.

mommy

my first mother's day w 3 darling daughters.... LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!

occasionally I still get the question "are you going to try for a boy"... ummmm.... no. not that I have anything against boys, but really, I believe God will give us the children we are meant to have, our hands are pretty full at this point, and the assumption that our family isn't complete without one of each gender makes me feel like the person asking me must not realize that there is not one canned 'boy personality' and one canned 'girl personality'... with 3 daughters I know that they are each very different, and they are each such wonderful gifts to me

I thank God for that!!

Bento Bento Bento

Just a Girl had a list of links and one of them that I checked out was this great blog...

the goal: HEALTHIER lunches for your kiddos... the kind that they will actually eat, mind you.

why it works: We all know that toddlers/preschoolers tend to be grazers. They love to snack rather than sit down for a giant meal (at least that's how my 2 older girls are)... so, to me, this idea meets that preference and at the same time fills their bellies w/healthy attractive meals that will keep them fueled through their busy days. I'm no pro yet. I don't have fancy egg shapers or anything like that, but I finally remembered to take a picture of one (I bought the gladware disposable divided containers and they fit PERFECTLY in older daughter's lunch box)...

what's for lunch for her today?

~1 boiled egg (she would eat her weight in these if she could)


~1 slice of american cheese (it's under the juice box... usually we have string cheese, but momma needs to pick that up at the store)


~1 apple juice box


~2 big cut up strawberries (she's picky w/fruit, so we will see how this goes

~a handful of whales crackers (whales are Target's version of goldfish)

my other lunch tip... oldest daughter loves to get a 'special note' in her lunch each day (sometimes I have trouble thinking of something)... but to multi-task, I buy colored beverage napkins (you can usually find fun ones on clearance at Target) and write the note on the napkin w/different colored sharpies... fun!

3

Baby girl #3 has arrived... I can't begin to describe the wonderful. She is perfect and beautiful and lovely. I'm loving the time I have to spend getting to know her. This was easily the hardest labor I've ever had, but I also appreciate this 'after' so much more. I guess that is a pretty decent trade, considering I have a forever of 'after' and the labor was only temporary...

more on her birth story in a bit, but for now... feast your eyes...

have you had the baby yet?

I'm getting that and similar comments a lot lately... you're so huge! are you having twins? when is the baby coming? what is the baby doing?

I'm getting to that uncomfortable and cranky stage these days and the snarky answers that I come up with in my head, fortunately aren't leaking out to the rest of the world... yet.

But, today is the 16th, and my edd is the 25th. Since I'm using a new doctor this time, I don't know his policies on letting moms go past their due date, but all signs point to the fact that I'll be holding my sweet baby girl within the next 9 days. Only 9 days left! It is really hard to wrap my brain around.

We have 2 major things left to accomplish 1)choosing her name (which won't be posted here anyways, but trust me, it is HARD finding a name that you and your husband agree on that 'goes' with the names of your other 2 girls) and 2)buying a minivan. We're hoping to do that on Friday (if I haven't had the baby yet!!).

That's right... I'm going to be one of 'those' minivan moms. And since husband coaches soccer at school, the 2 older girls already have a deep fascination with all things soccer. Which means, I may eventually have to become... gulp... a soccer mom. Maybe I should start wearing jumpers and keds... sigh. I'll think about that another day.

But really, this post is about my baby. I cannot wait to meet her, to hold her, to nurse her, to witness her sisters meeting her for the first time. I cannot wait to take that first bleary-eyed photo of the 5 (yes, I said FIVE!) of us together. Baby girl come soon! Your family cannot wait to meet you!

back to sick...

We were doing SO well... we're one week away from oldest daughter and husband being out of school for the year. Getting to that point... that goal... it meant having just enough sick leave saved up for maternity leave... it meant not needing to take any more time off of work this calendar year... it meant not spending more money on co-pays, prescriptions, pedialite, and ramen... it meant we were all well and despite anything else that could have been going wrong in our lives, we had our health which is the most important thing...

... but little one woke up this morning and threw up. Immediately she was fine, running around playing with her sister and her cousin and not having a care in the world. I THOUGHT it might have been a fluke... unfortunately it wasn't. After lunch and during the afternoon nap whatever is ailing her decided to hit her hard. A fever all afternoon and she has thrown up more times than I can count now. There's an odd disturbance that comes with having a sick kiddo... the cuteness (not sure what else to call it) of their sick weak voice and their desire for cuddles, the helplessness as they need you to help with everything (whether it's changing them, getting them a drink, or literally helping through the act of throwing up), the weakness of their bodies, the heat a fever generates... it's enough to make a mommy weary. I was asked if I was going to take her to the doctor. My response was, "for what? a fever and some throwing up that has been going on for 12 hours?". I'm not sure when parents started taking their kiddos in to the pediatrician for every sniffle, and I hope I'm not jinxing anything by saying (writing)this, but I think we can tough out a little tummy bug without having it diagnosed as such by our pediatrician for a $25 copay (not that I'm complaining... about my access to health insurance OR our WONDERFUL pediatrician). I just hate for her sake that she's sick again and I hate the un-planned pause our lives are forced to take when we go through something like this.

I hope tonight boasts a miraculous recovery.

Seen & Not Heard?

My venting on this topic might go on for a bit, so if it is annoying you, please feel free to get on my case about it or ignore it... either way really does not bother me....

I'm thinking about that whole idea that children should be 'seen and not heard'... I'm thinking about it in a historical context that my experience can date back to my grandparents' generation. I'm certain my parents were raised with that mentality (lest grandpa make them go out and 'pick a switch'... no lie). In turn, my parents' generation raised their children in more of a 'live and let live' kind of world. I think my generation was the beginning of the 'raised with privilege' and 'everyone gets a trophy' and 'who cares about appropriateness, let the child EXPRESS him/her self' kind of world... in other words... spoiled.

I was one of the 'poor kids' growing up. At least, in my world I was a poor kid. I went to private school for 7 years and had to buy most of my clothes at Target and shoes from Payless. Occasionally we even shopped second hand! I didn't have a seperate playroom in my house, and I was 13 before I had my own tv (a black & white handmedown from my grandparents!!!!). We only went out to dinner once a week. I took tap lessons for one year and since my black tap shoes that my dad found at a garage sale were not the right color for our recital, my dad spray painted them white. Yup... we were POOR (she says in TOTAL jest).

Ya know what... growing up 'poor' brought a lot of perspective, as has my background in ministry. As Americans (oh how I could go on forever) we don't know the first thing about poor. I don't think I know a single person who has ever dug through trash for food. In fact, I don't know anyone who goes without 3 meals a day (even if those meals were bought with foodstamps, WIC, or other charitable means).

The gift of my children is such a tremendous blessing, and raising my children in a balance between 'seen and not heard' and 'spoiled' seems like the right way to go. I don't spank my children, but I also don't let them get away with murder. My girls have an entire bedroom full of (new)toys and closets that are filled mostly with handmedown clothes.

I heard a story once about an American bishop going to Africa and celebrating mass outdoors. He was struck with awe over how quiet and well-behaved the children were a strong contrast to the noisiness of his urban cathedral back in the states. Speaking to his brother bishop about it after mass he wondered at how families in Africa were able to raise their chidlren with so much respect and discipline while attending a long, hot Sunday mass. The African bishop replied that the children were so quiet because they had no energy because they were hungry.

Do those who attend mass and look down their noses at noisy kiddos not understand this concept? Have they never been a parent and don't know what a struggle it is just to find that delicate balance between squelching their curiousity and teaching them reverence? Or have they forgotten? Or was it beaten into them and they accept that as normal?

I make no claims at being perfect in any way, least of all in my parenting skills, but I AM trying. I don't judge, but I see a lot of others who don't try at all. Do my efforts count for anything? Is it fair to preach about how sinful it is, and a bad example to one's children, to skip Sunday mass, but then at the same time make those parents feel completely unwelcome in the parish... rather it isn't the parents who are unwelcome, just their kids.

4

Today, my oldest turns 4. This one feels especially significant for me, and the only reason I can think to explain it is that my 4th birthday is the first one I really remember. There's a sense within me as a parent that if I know I have memories, clear specific memories, going back to that age, then my kiddo can too. And that reflects on the intentionality in my parenting. Not that I'm not already intentional, just that... I hope I'm not screwing up too much.

But enough about me...

a few pictures of my beautiful girl...

2 turns at joy

in the past few weeks, despite the chaos, i can look back and remember specifically 2 things that are so joyous in my world...

the first is a major milestone, one that has been a LONG TIME COMING...

oldest daughter has struggled so hard with the potty training issue. when it comes right down to it, the girl is stubborn and the only answer to the potty training issue is that she would be 'trained' when she was darn good and ready. there wasn't ANY getting around that. i worried that we may be backsliding when 3 days in a row her teacher sent home clothes needing laundered from accidents. after those 3 days, i sat with her as she got dressed in the morning, showed her the 'pretty panties' that mommy had just purchased (some may call this wasteful, i call it grasping for sanity, but i am so over trying to scrub out stains from underwear. in our house they typically get thrown out) and how mommy really wanted her to try to not have an accident, to go poop and pee in the potty, and keep her panties pretty. now, i am nowhere near arrogant enough to think that it was those words that made a difference. i was pleading with her more than anything, and as i tried to hide the desperation in my voice, i know that above anything else, SHE made a choice that day. and boy did i get to hear about it. her wonderful teacher used her cell phone to let her call and tell me "Momma! I pooped on the potty- at SCHOOL!!!!!" I rejoiced with her, congratulated her, told her daddy would take her for a special treat, and encouraged her to keep up the hard work. I thanked her teacher for helping us on this journey and for sharing our joy and making that moment special for all of us. This all took place last week on Wednesday and we have been 100% accident free since then. In fact, she isn't even wetting her pull-up at night. This morning I asked if she thought she wanted to try to wear panties at night but she said no. I definitely will not push on that. I'm just SO PROUD of her.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My other joyous story can actually be told in pictures. I don't want to sound snobby or arrogant, but I believe that I have 2 really beautiful daughters (and I'm growing a 3rd... watch out world!)... their similar looks really strike me at times, and this time was no different. I happened to catch a shot of younger daughter smelling some mums at a local garden center and the picture I caught looked (un)surprisingly similar to another one I had caught 2 years before (of her sister)... what do you think?

younger daughter almost 2, October 2009

oldest daughter almost 2, October 2007

funny things kids say

My boss is always telling me to keep track of the funny things that my kiddos say because I'll want to remember them later and won't be able to.... so I'm starting by keeping them here and the post will always be titled ..... "Funny things kids say"

right now we are dog-sitting for my mom and so oldest daughter let them out last night to use the bathroom. she came back to let me know and said "mom, I put Eddy and Bonnie out so that they won't pee and poop on your carpet and then your tears will not come and you will not cry."

priceless.

Great Advice

I love to read Memories on Clover Lane for this mom's fantastic views on parenting as a Catholic. Her photography is beautiful, her life is real, her children are animated and fabulous.

Read this today. You won't be sorry.

Goals or Resolutions

My online mommy group decided to do a list of goals/resolutions. I'm not sure which category my list falls under (I'm thinking goals)

either way, here's my list

Get back on track with our budget
Pay off our credit card and husband's student loan (that would leave only medical bills and mortgage for debt!)
Lose 20 (maybe 25) pounds
Complete one sewing project every month (did I tell you all I got a sewing machine for Christmas)
Buy husband a truck
Keep up with the house more
Get oldest daughter fully potty trained by the start of the summer

Holiday Recap

Well, I took a short blogging break in order to make it through my time off... yup, my work (and husband's school) gave us 2 weeks off! Today's my first day back in the office. Boy is it hard to concentrate when your mind has basically been in free fall for 2 straight weeks....

so, here's a recap of our time:
23rd- got off at noon-ish and went shopping for the last minute stuff

24th- got up and went to my sister's house for Christmas w/her family and my mom & stepdad... the only picture i got was this: my mom opening the book that i got her (it's called 'my granny's purse' and it is TOO cute!)

left my sister's and drove to husband's home town for a little Christmas eve-ing at the in-laws (attn: booderbean's mom... your dad was great as santa yet again!), drove home that evening

santa came to our house too!

25th got up and did the presents and breakfast thing

(who's excited that santa brought her a new dora sippy cup in her stocking?)

(santa brought me my first sewing machine! ROCK!)

went to church

ate lunch at a flipping CHINESE RESTAURANT!!! (fa ra ra ra ra)
went to my dad's for more presents and dinner

26th went to oldest daughters godparents house for a little visiting... oldest daughter got some of her money out when we went to target that day and purchased a cake mix to make cupcakes for her godparents (isn't that the sweetest?)

27th went to a play place w/oldest daughter's godparents' grandchildren

28th went to my aunt's for a fierce game of dirty santa (i won an awesome coffee press!) and a fabulous gingerbread house decorating contest (for those of you looking for an activity for a post-christmas party, you can usually buy the kits for half off and they are quite a bit of fun... hopefully i'll have pictures of my team's winning house soon)

29th cleaned the house all the live long day so that husband's best friend from grade school could come down and stay with us

30th drove back to husband's home town for some delicious mexican food and some quality time w/friends and grandparents

31st youngest daughter came down w/ a nasty diaper rash and fever due to teething so we canceled our babysitter and our plans... had a somewhat quiet evening watching friend's son.

1st woohoo happy new year! friend's girlfriend got food poisoning. big fat bummer. avoid nachos at the cox convention center during flaming lips concert. went to church- feast of Mary the Mother of God (woot woot!!)

2nd got the girls out of the house so husband could get caught up on grading, then went out w/my mom and sister that evening and saw 7 pounds... it was FAB-U-LOUS!!!!

3rd husband decked our attic (or part of it) so that there is a GOOD (i.e. not the garage) place to store our christmas decorations, etc. went out w/husband that night at pf changs (at spicy sauce spilled all over my dress... booo! but cleaned it up pretty well) got free dinner, went to see 4 Christmases (pretty funny)

4th family slept in and we spent the day un-decorating (my house looks so bare!)

5th back here at work!

Speaking of Learning the hard way... Childproofing

I keep child proofing my house, but somehow they keep getting back in!

OK, let me start this with a little humor so that I don't have to cry my way through this post...

Yesterday was the ultimate day from he.

Husband and I were back in the bedroom getting ready for church, and like we do every Sunday, youngset daughter was taking her morning nap and oldest daughter was in the living room watching a video. The next thing we knew, oldest daughter came in our bathroom with a toy plastic plate covered in pink sticky stuff and said "mom & dad I took my medicine. Its all gone." So, obviously we freak out and she takes us in the kitchen where she's got a dining room chair pulled up to the cabinet and theres the empty bottle of children's tylenol w/a little bit of it poured out on the counter. I knew previously that the bottle had only been half full, but I couldn't for the life of me figure out where she got it. We keep our medicine in the linen closet in the hallway up on a shelf that is about 4.5 feet up. (Still haven't figured that one out) So we called poison control and the guy asked her weight, how much she took, etc. and he told us that she would have had to have taken a lot more than that to hurt her, but to keep an eye on her and if she got sick to her stomach then to call back. Well, husband didn't really like that answer, so he called the after hours number for the pedi. She called us back and said that Tylenol poisoning can be really serious and not have a lot of symptoms leading up to it, so it would be better to just go to the er. So we loaded up to do that and she was so brave. They had her drink the charcoal and she just sat there and sipped it through the straw like it was no big deal. The doctor came in to see her and said that they have to wait until 4 hours after she took the Tylenol to see what her levels are to see if she needed the antedote or not. So I had my mom come down and get youngest daughter and take her home. The 4 hours waiting got to be really frustrating b/c oldest daughter was so restless. They had to put a port in her hand to draw the blood and be able to easily administer medicine if needed, which for that I just laid on the bed with her and held her arm still and just talked to her and she looked at me while they put it in and said "Ow mommy, that hurt!" And literally that was it. After the 4 hours they drew the blood, and her level was 4. The doctor explained that it would have had to be in the 100s for them to be really worried, so either the charcoal absorbed a lot of it or she didn't actually take very much (if that's the case, my best guess is that she poured it down the drain or trash). Whew. Needless to say it was incredibly scary and we are going to Walmart tonight to stock up on more cabinet locks and stuff. I really haven't been able to figure out how she got into the cabinet, other than if she used the bottom shelves (which aren't locked up b/c they just have towels) to climb to get up to the upper shelf. Either way, its all getting locked up now. I cannot begin to tell you how bad I feel. I sat in her bed last night just crying (she was playing in the other room with Joe) just thinking how very different the whole thing could have ended. So, hug your kiddos extra tight tonight and double check EVERYTHING in your house.

Momma, I sick.

It all started a week and a half ago when I started feeling achy at work, only to get the taletell signs of a UTI (tmi I know. good thing I hardly ever get anyone reading this bloggity blog blog) Then, last Thursday, husband came home feeling tired. The next thing we knew he was spending the majority of the evening bowing down to the porcelin gods (so to speak). The next day he drags his booty to school anyway and half-heartedly makes it through the day. I went and picked the girls up at daycare, and the oldest had just puked about 5 minutes prior. LOVELY. I had tried to write off husband's puking as food poisoning, but then it was clear we had a stomach virus. That evening, I never actually got sick but was utterly exhausted all evening. I just camped out on the couch with oldest daughter and slept most of the night and next morning away. By Sunday morning I hadn't really been sick and younger daughter hadn't been sick either and I thought we were home free. Oh contraire! Younger daughter proceeds to puke all over me as we get home from having lunch after church. LOVELY... I was convinced I was next. So, I took Monday off to keep her home and give her time to recover and continued on with my week. Well, I got a call again today from our daycare provider that oldest daughter said she didn't feel good. Low and behold, she's running a 100.1 fever now.

Fantabulous.

Oh how they grow... year 3

Every year my mom and my sister and I take our girls (mine and my sister's, although technically my mom's girls are there too) to a little garden center near my mom's house to take some fall pictures. I've already learned that I can't have big expectations for perfect poses and smiles, I have to snap snap snap away and hope to get a few cute shots. Or at least some where everyone is looking at the camera and maybe smiling... this year's picture day was super windy, something my youngest daughter isn't terribly used to, so she looks pretty taken aback in most of the shots. We always take one of the girls together, so let's look at how this shot has progressed over the years...

photo op

Ree over at the Pioneer Woman asked this question today (for one of her giveaways): What is your favorite photography subject?

Well, the answer came easy for me (maybe I'll win that awesome printer!)... its my girls... what I've learned as a mommy is that taking pictures of your kids is kind of an art. It is not a science. Not something that can be 'mastered'... you have to work work work at it (i.e. snap snap snap a lot of pictures) and every once in a while you get something really cute....

so, I thought I'd share some of my favorites

oldest daughter:

youngest daughter:

positive parenting

another great post about parenting...

http://highheelsandasippycup.blogspot.com/2008/09/positive-discpline-toddler-style.html

Potty Training... finally a really GREAT how-to

OK, honestly, this is all any mom will ever need to know. When youngest daughter is ready to potty train and I'm ripping my hair out, I will be coming back to this for SURE

preachin'

we were talking here at work the other day about how busy life can be, especially when you have kiddos. a lot of this comes naturally. if your kiddos are anything like mine (especially oldest daughter... she is a burning ball of constant chaotic energy!) they need entertainment, not to mention education, discipline, re-fueling, spiritual guidance, etc. now, oldest daughter is only 2.5 right now, so i know some moms will read this and ROLL THEIR EYES AT ME... and that's fine... if someday i have to eat my words, then i will do it. i'm not above that (hmmm... reminds me of a billy joel song... let me google the exact lyric... brb.....

If there's a chance of resurrecting a love
I'm not above going back to the start
To find out where the heartache
began

... ok so maybe it doesn't fit exactly... but i digress) i'm not above admitting that i'm utterly full of crap for what i'm about to say...

kids these days are overbooked, overextended, and basically forced to compete at the most ridiculous levels imagineable. i have a friend whose 6 year old plays t-ball and on saturdays and they play freakin' DOUBLE HEADERS! seriously. SERIOUSLY. i think that's stupid. and maybe i'll eat these words, but if playing sports for kids means that one kid spends hours upon hours in one day playing that sport, well forget it. especially not at age 6. i will personally take it upon myself to organize a non-competitive, non-crazy scheduled league for sports for my kiddos. SERIOUSLY!

currently my daughter has never been enrolled in any classes, trainings, programs, etc. heck, she hasn't even had swim lessons yet. i just don't feel the need for her to do it yet, she is still discovering the types of things she's interested in (informally) not to mention the amount that it costs for said lessons is crazy, and if i'm going to pay that much for dues, classes, memberships, costumes, uniforms, etc. it dang well better be for something that she actually wants to do... and currently, she doesn't know what she wants to do from one minute to the next. by the time i get the peter pan movie she has request into the vcr (yes you read that right... we still have TAPES in our house!) she has already changed her mind that she really wants to watch 'hontas' (also known as Pocahontas). if we were doing classes at this age, by the time i signed her up for gymnastics she would be totally uninterested and really want to take soccer.

and while i'm on that topic, husband and i have already started discussing how many extra-curriculars is too many. i guarantee there will be no rushing from soccer to ballet to violin to scouts in our house. not that my kids can't be interested or even involved in more than one thing, but it won't be more than one thing on the same day, and the majority of our family's evenings will not be spent at those things. we will have a stable family, a family that spends time together, not scattered. so help me, i will make it happen. and maybe my kiddos will be mad at me every once in a while. maybe there will be a few tears as they hear a few "nos". maybe they will be angry at me and say that i'm not their best friend anymore. no skin off my back. its not my job to be my kids' friend. its my job to be their mom. and to me, this is what it means to be a good one.
so, that's my rant for the day.